


(And I Like You)

by Lacy_Star



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: ??? kinda ig, Alternate Universe - High School, Gay Epiphany, High School, Human AU, Light Angst, M/M, Songfic, Unrequited Crush, more relationships to be added but for the sake of surprise its just this for now...., patton is gay
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-27
Updated: 2020-06-26
Packaged: 2021-03-04 05:33:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,725
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24938344
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lacy_Star/pseuds/Lacy_Star
Summary: Patton’s pretty sure he’s fallen in love with every boy who’s ever entered his car.
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders
Comments: 4
Kudos: 10





	(And I Like You)

It was sophomore year when Patton began to have the inclination that he was gay.

Looking back, the lack of any attraction to a girl would have also been a clue. Though Patton couldn’t judge himself too harshly in retrospect-- he was pretty sure he’d never had a true crush until then anyways.

He remembered the night it happened. It was a week after he’d gotten his driver’s license, about mid-January. And thank God he had; the night it happened was banking on him passing the driver's test. Perhaps there would’ve been less pressure had Virgil not failed his own test a month prior. But luck was on Patton’s side. Or, at least the ability to parallel park without hitting the curb and getting a huge scrape on the side of the car was on Patton’s side. 

The event in question was a Lorde concert that they had been building up to for months. Significant, as they were both concert virgins up until that time. Patton had never gone because he worried about getting lost, and had never been fond enough of any particular artist to ask his mom to go to the expense of getting him tickets. Virgil, on the other hand, would seem like much more the type to go to a concert and it was surprising that he hadn’t already. But, in his words, “Going to a concert with your dad is just… not cool.” And though Virgil’s dads would have been more than willing to do so, Patton was sure, they were understandably left out.

The biggest restraint, of course, was the inability to drive. Otherwise Virgil would’ve been going to stadiums every other month to see any of the slew of touring bands he was always on a kick for. In the end, Patton was a little sure Virgil had only asked him to come along so that he could have a ride should his driver’s test not work out (and if that were the case, Virgil was definitely a psychic), but Virgil had gone to extensive lengths to find a concert by a singer that they would both like. They’d decided on Lorde because Patton had witnessed Virgil cry to some of her songs before, which was always a sign that the artist warranted high praise on Virgil’s very tiered, well rounded music preference list, and because Patton thought she had a nice voice. He didn’t quite get all the lyrics, though that wasn’t a surprise considering that in comparison, “analyze the hell out of song lyrics” (excuse the language) was one of Virgil’s favorite nightly pastimes. Still, he enjoyed how her songs sounded and how they made him feel.

Also, regardless of whoever the musician was, Patton would never turn down a chance to hang out with Virgil-- especially if it was for something that made him happy.

Strangely enough, the concert wasn’t even the highlight. It had been fun, of course, and Virgil had cried, which had made _him_ cry, and he hadn’t gotten lost, so those were all very positive things. But afterward as they fought their way out of the parking lot Virgil mentioned getting something to eat. They were planning on Denny’s, but the car alerted that a tire needed air on the way, so they pulled into a gas station and, as Patton refilled his tires, Virgil went inside to get snacks.   
  
When he stood back up from his intense tire work, Virgil was sitting on top of the car, sucking on a slushy and looming over him like a gargoyle. Patton wasn’t phased in the slightest. 

“Catch,” Virgil warned before tossing a small parcel at Patton, who failed to catch it completely and watched as it skidded on the ground. Upon picking it up he saw it was a cosmic brownie. He grinned widely. “Thanks!”

Then Virgil patted the roof of the car without comment, signaling to Patton to come up and join him.

“What if someone needs air for their tires too, huh?” Patton argued, “And shouldn’t we be getting home?”  
  
Virgil merely pointed to the air tank, which had two separate pumps in case someone else needed to fill their tires at the same time, and shrugged in response to the second question.

Patton rolled his eyes in good humor, deciding it was safer to eat and drink in one place rather than to do it while driving. He walked around to the back of the car and raised up a hand for help. Virgil set down his drink, leaning down to assist him and they grabbed each other by the forearm so Virgil could hoist him up.

Sitting cross-legged on the roof, Patton ripped open the Cosmic brownie packaging and stuffed it in his mouth. It tasted as average as most store brownies did-- bland and with sprinkles that tasted more like wax than sprinkle, but a brownie was a brownie and Patton wouldn’t complain about it. 

Next to Virgil there was a plastic bag, probably filled with more unhealthy snacks and junk food, and a blue slushy. He passed the drink to Patton who accepted it with another thank you. Once he took a sip, Patton let it melt on his tongue, enjoying the cheaply flavoured blueberry water. The coolness of it made him shiver.

Perhaps drinking something to make his insides as cold as his outsides wasn’t a good idea. January in Florida wasn’t the worst, but at night when the frigidity was emphasized it could be a bit much. Patton had overlooked this fact and was in short sleeves. It hadn’t been as noticeable in the crowded bandstand with a thousand bodies crammed together to get some heat flowing, but now he was shivering where he sat. How silly of him to forget.

Virgil spared him a glance and seemed to notice the goosebumps. “Cold?”  
  
“A little,” Patton admitted, breath coming out in a shaky huff.

Virgil rolled his eyes at him. “Should’ve worn something warmer.”

“Probably, haha…”

Then Virgil returned to his drink and Patton decided to do the same, finishing off the brownie and crumpling the plastic to shove in his pocket. He didn’t want Virgil to worry, as he often did, so he tried to curl into himself to preserve his own body heat.

It didn’t work. He wondered if it would be okay to inch a little closer to Virgil. Like a penguin huddle! That would be fine, right?

Virgil was staring at him, brow creased ever so slightly. Patton was about to reassure him when he asked, “... Do you want my hoodie?”

Patton had to check that he’d heard correctly. Virgil’s hoodie was sacred to him-- not something so easily abandoned. He wore it everywhere, no matter how hot it was in the Florida heat. He’d almost passed out at a carnival once from being so overheated and refusing to take it off. It was a comfort item for him and Patton wouldn’t want to take that away from him. He plastered on a sweet smile and shook his head. “You don’t have to.”

But Virgil was already unzipping it and pulling his arms from the sleeves. “It’s fine.”

“I don’t wanna be a bother,” Patton protested. The last thing he wanted was for Virgil to see assisting him as a task or to get cold himself. “And I don’t want _you_ to turn into a popsicle!”

But Virgil was wearing a sweater underneath the hoodie and he hardly seemed phased by the rush of wind as he held out the hoodie to Patton. “No you.”

Patton glanced between the hoodie and Virgil’s face a few times before begrudgingly accepting it, a pit of guilt in his stomach. He slipped it on and zipped it up, his arms screaming in relief. 

Virgil wasn’t a really touchy person unless he was in the right mood, but Patton swore the hoodie was just like a hug from him-- all encompassing and safe and warm. Perhaps it was the smell Patton caught a whiff of when the collar grazed by his nose. Something he could only describe as “boyish.” He found he liked it. A lot. Like a sedative that put him at ease. He supposed Virgil just had that effect.

It was soft, too. Patton found himself already beginning to feel better. “Thank you…”  
  
Virgil just shrugged. “You’re welcome.” Then he finished off his slushy until his sucking on the straw was making the dry, growling noise. He set it to the side.

“Do you still have your ticket stub?” He asked suddenly. Patton glanced up to him.

“Uh, yeah! Why?” He reached into his jeans’ pocket and pulled it out. Perhaps a little wrinkled, but not much worse for wear.

“Do you want it?” Virgil was using the tone of voice he usually used when he wanted to ask for something or say something but was too afraid to in fear of being perceived as annoying. Patton knew him too well.

Patton shook his head, making sure his smile was reassuring. Whatever Virgil wanted, he was sure it wouldn’t be a bother. “Nope! You wanna have it?”  
  
Virgil glanced away, eyes lowered and unsure. “Um… I think I want to make earrings out of them.”

Virgil’s dads had just let him get his ears pierced for his sixteenth birthday after years of begging, and he was always on the lookout for new earrings to wear or make. Patton was touched that he’d be willing to take a memento from this occasion and make something so beautiful out of it. He nodded so hard his head could’ve bobbled right off. “Oh, yeah! Go ahead! That sounds super cool, you’ll have to show me,” He requested as he held out the ticket stub to Virgil.

“You can just put that in my pocket. Um.. thank you.”  
  
Right. Patton was wearing Virgil’s hoodie. He slipped the ticket in the pocket, feeling several small items of Virgil's in there and deciding better than to pry.

By the time Patton had finished his own slushy, Virgil was popping open a bag of sour cream and onion chips. Patton was aware that Virgil kept sneaking glances at him, clearly having something on his mind but not wanting to speak up about it.

“Penny for your thoughts?” He prompted.

Virgil shrugged and sighed, though he seemed relieved to be able to talk. “It’s just… this is nice. I really enjoyed tonight. We haven’t really um… been hanging out as much lately.”

Patton had really been trying to branch out lately with meeting new people, and admittedly he’d been a little neglectful of Virgil because of that. Not that he meant to do that at all, it was just a side effect of his schedule becoming busier. He gave an apologetic smile and nodded eagerly. “I know, I’m sorry. We totally should more! I miss you!”

He _did_ miss Virgil. Virgil was a low energy person to be around. He felt as if he could truly relax around him. He felt safe and happy with Virgil, because years of bonding was so comforting to be able to fall back on.

But then it happened.

Then Virgil gave a rare, crooked smile and said, “Sounds cool.” And then completely unprompted he leaned to rest his head against Patton’s shoulder. And then Patton’s heart kicked into overdrive and it felt like the air had been kicked out of his lungs and his arms and hands felt tingly like he had to move or flail them and the force of it all nearly knocked him off of the roof of the car.

It was odd, because Patton had gotten "crushes" before but those were in elementary school and before puberty, so it practically didn’t count. Those had been shy meaningless glances and giggles, and _this_ was actually _affecting_ him. He could _feel_ it. It was a sensation he’d never experienced before, but when it happened he just kinda _knew_ in the way that one does.

His mom had explained to him that there were some people who didn’t feel romantic attraction at all, herself included, and that it was okay, and for a minute he’d been believing he was one of them. But gay?

Patton was by no means homophobic. When your best friend has two dads, acceptance is somewhat inevitable. Plus, his mom had raised him by teaching him tolerance and by ensuring he knew that people that were perhaps different to him were by no means bad. He’d just never considered that possibility for himself. Though, again, he’d never really found girls all that appealing…

All this and more rushed through his head as he stared down at Virgil, who was blissfully unaware of Patton’s internal dilemma and was instead gazing out at the highway just beyond the parking lot. Even washed out in the harsh, white lights from the gas station he looked soft and fragile. Patton’s stomach did flips and he tore his eyes away before he could keep overthinking.

“I’m like ten minutes past my curfew,” Virgil muttered after a while.

That, thankfully, got Patton to wake up. “What!?”  
  
Virgil was chuckling, “Yeah. They wanted me back by 11:30.” He pulled his phone out and flashed it at Patton. It read “11:42” and had a notification of a text from Remy, one of his dads, which said, “ _The next time you’re going to sleep over at Patton’s, please just let us know. Goodnight <3” _

“They think I’m staying over at your house,” Virgil realized, face falling into a frown, “Shit, I’m gonna have to sneak in or something…” He glanced up at Patton after the expletive escaped him, “Sorry for swearing.”

Patton just shook his head-- he didn't mind as much as he made it seem he did. “Well first of all, warn me next time so I don’t get you home late! And second…” He trailed off, his heart doing another involuntary flip as the next words left his mouth, “You can always stay over if you want. You know my mom loves you.” 

There wasn't anything truly strange about the offer-- it was one he'd extended to Virgil many times. But at that moment, with all the swirling in his tummy it somehow felt different to him.

Virgil’s eyes went wide and hopeful and it stole Patton’s breath away. “... Really?”

“Of course!” Patton assured with a horrible voice crack.

“... If it’s not too much trouble…”  
  
“Of course it isn’t! Come on, we can watch a movie or play monopoly…”   
  
Virgil cracked a nervous smile. “Let’s not do that again. I’d like to stay your friend, if that’s okay.”   
  
Patton giggled and it felt like bubbles erupting out of him thanks to Virgil just smiling at him. “Alright, alright. Come on, let’s go.”

He and Virgil precariously slid off of the car’s roof and went into the car. Patton pulled out of the parking lot as Virgil buckled himself into shotgun, leaving the place and its experience behind them.

On the ride home they were nearly silent, with soft music flowing through the car speakers. Perhaps Virgil found the silence comforting, with how relaxed he seemed, but Patton was struggling. 

Virgil was his best friend in the whole world, but he was pretty sure these feelings were a bit strong by friend standards. Patton loved Virgil, don’t get him wrong! But if Virgil knew… what if he was weirded out?  
  
What if Patton was making it up? He wasn’t totally sure if he was even gay or not. Was that a possibility for him? He knew Virgil had mentioned his own questioning a couple times discreetly to him, so maybe he would understand. But would he understand if those feelings were directed towards _him?_

Perhaps it was better to not say anything, Patton thought. Yes, that’s what he would do. The feelings would likely just subside on their own, right? This was likely all in his head. He just wouldn’t say anything and it would all go away.

The next morning when he awoke next to Virgil’s form, sleeping soundly in his bed a mere few feet away from him, it didn’t.

Two weeks later when Virgil texted him to ask if he was up for hanging out later and Patton texted back, “ _Sorry!!! I’m helping out with the drama club after school!!!”_ it had.

**Author's Note:**

> Title of fic and chapter titles are from "400 Lux" by Lorde.


End file.
